Strange facts: Did you know that if you live across the street from a cemetery in the state of Florida, that you can't be buried in it?

During the whole day I was struggling to get my wife's attention so I sat on the couch with a beer and turned on the TV. That did the trick

Aim for the moon so that even if you fail you land amongst the stars. It a constellation prize

Doughnut Resuscitate

In my younger days I posed for a picture with the band R.E.M. That's me in the corner

In mid-evil times Lance was a common name. People where called Lance a lot

By their prawnouns

So I got out of bed and started looking with him.

A woman went into a doctor's office with a baby & was taken into an examining room to see the doctor, who checked the baby, found him somewhat underweight and asked the woman, “Is he breast fed or on the bottle?" "Breast fed,” she replied. “Well then, strip down to your waist," ordered the doctor. She took@off her top and bra and sat on the examining table. The doctor started pressing, kneading and pinching both breasts for quite a while. It was a very detailed and thorough examination. He then motioned for her to get dressed The doc motioned to her to get dressed and said, “No wonder this baby is underweight. You don't have any milk.” The woman grinned and replied, “Well of course I don't – I'm his aunt - but I'm sure glad I brought him in!"

but gets arrested and starts yelling, "Wait, you are making a mistake; this is a set-up!"

Midi-chlorians